History of Seacourt’s Cricket Team, known as The Racqueteers to follow …
2019 Media Gallery
2019 Match Reports
Raqs v Compton 29th August 2019
The Raqs had their last Thursday evening fixture of the season against a new opponent at the picturesque Compton.
With August light fading it was recommended we start promptly at 5 30pm which would have been good, however the skip was late, but all is forgiven because we won the toss and duly batted first.
In went Rob (the better) Cells and Callum (the bowler- apparently) Cells. Callum departed without troubling the scorers, so next up was Bryan- one of JK’s new friends at Westbourne. Some excellent batting saw both Rob and Bryan reach in excess of 25 and retire.
Tony Watton (HICC’s 2nd team skipper) stepped in for the Raqs at last minute and explained that he was in the dog house when he got home- his mood remained upbeat despite his 1st ball duck!
Gorv was quickly joined at the crease by Beef and the pair pushed the score up towards 100. Beef dealing in boundaries and Gorv failing to get the ball far off the square with a number of ones.
Beef hit Compton’s strike bowler for four off middle stump and was then bowled the ball after for a well made 21. As AJ came to the crease, he asked Gorv for some advice about the bowler however the only words that sprung to mind were ‘he’s a nutter.’
Towards the end of the innings there was some hard running and good hitting by Josh and Freddie. Josh even pulled out a reverse sweep- he really was showing off last night but more of that to come….
The raqs scored a fairly imposing 139 on a tough wicket and slow outfield. Callum and Tony opened the batting and much to everyone’s surprise Callum managed to pitch every ball of his spell on the right wicket and every ball was somewhere near the intended target…what a shame he has left it until the end of the season! 3 wickets for Callum certainly made up for the batting and the two dropped catches which came later.
James came on for a spell down the hill and was unfortunate to be met by Compton’s best batsman who carted the ball all over the place, only the clubhouse roof, into the fields and one shot blasted into the trees- new balls please! We were all pleased to see him retire on his 25 off about 7 balls.
As the game was getting away from Compton they sent out their number 8 batsman who was batting wearing gardening gloves and who didn’t look too far shy of 80. With Freddie coming on to bowl, it was only a matter of time surely?? But no, Freddie fed the old timer with balls outside the off stump as 4 followed 4…something had to change and Skip took him off after 1 over.
Josh was bowling down the hill and gathering some good pace which was all too much for the Compton batsman to handle as Josh took a brilliant one handed caught and bowled low to his right hand side- he was fined post match (and rightly so) for showing off with bat and ball!
The game came towards a close with Gorv and Freddie bowling in tandem, Callum dropping catches and Compton claiming he was doing it on purpose in order to avoid the retired batsman coming back in- every member of the team jumping to Callum’s defence and explaining that ‘no, he really can’t catch’!
A thoroughly enjoyable game ended in the pub where JK decided to spend everyone’s match fee on the raffle and came out with a homemade cake to be served up as pudding, a bottle of wine for Rob Cells MOM and some ciders which seemed to disappear!
Well done to the Raqs for a good win and to James for organising all of the fixtures.
Racs v. Ladwacas – Thu 22nd Aug
The Racs turned out in the August evening sunshine to face the Ladwacas in our annual match against this nomadic side. Having lost the toss the Racs took the field hoping to restrict the opposition to a manageable score in a match reduced to 18 overs a side. JK opened the bowling and it soon became apparent that his moonlighting for Westborne might have had some beneficial impact on both his bowling and language. Gaz, the Racs equivalent of Ben Stokes (…well they are both ginger…) took the new ball with JK and bowled a nagging line and length keeping things tighter than a clam with lockjaw (it’s a family read…!).
After the early overs it became apparent the Ladwacas were unlikely to post a significant total and Skip took the opportunity to spread the bowling around, with 9 of the side getting at least one over. Gaz, Skip, AJ and Harry all picked up wickets and despite a number of dropped catches (…Gaz, Freddie, Josh x 2 and I’m sure I’ve missed a couple of others!!) the Ladwacas were restricted to 75-4 off their 18 overs.
Grizzer and Phil “the golf pro” on debut lead the chase. Alas that didn’t last long as Phil smashed a lob wedge straight up and into the arms of square leg to join the “Primary Club” on debut. Griz didn’t quite find his best form and fell shortly after for 5 leaving the Racs in similar state to the national team at 5 for 2.
In came “Beef” who was actually seen to hit one into the off-side and Freddie who made short work of the opposition bowling most notably with 3 consecutive fours using his girls bat. Freddie was next out for a quickfire 18 to leave Beef and Neil to give a masterclass in quick singles. Neil looked in good shape to repeat his MoM performance of last week but his eyes lit up at the slower bowler who proceeded to lob a bomb into the night sky, bamboozling Neil in the process and the old boy behind the sticks did the rest dislodging the bails before Neil realised he’d missed it. Harry C struck a few hearty blows in a quickfire 15 whilst Beef kept the chase on track. Much to everyone’s surprise Beef fell just before the end for a season defining 20 leaving Josh to wrap things up as he despatched his first ball to the long on boundary, nearly decapitating a dog on its evening stroll in the process.
A comfortable win for the Racs, reaching the total off 11.1overs. A huge thankyou to AJ who scored impeccably during the second innings and of course to Vinnie V who managed not to coach away JK’s new found form and was generous as ever in keeping his arms by his side as the ball bounced perilously close to the edge of the cut wicket. MoM – “Beef” for his runs, BBQ skills and finding the offside.
PS – Massive congratulations to Harry and the future Mrs Cottle….maybe one day we could have 3 generations of Cottle in the same Racs team….!
Close but no cigar…or was it?
The Racqueteers vrs Westbourne CC 6th June 2019
Before we get into the facts and figures of the match, the disgruntled author would like to raise a “point of order” and maybe on more than one occasion during the report. It is my request to the Fines Manager for the next match, that a multiplier should be used for two members of our team for dissent when it comes to authoring the match report, and another multiplier for egregious scoring and recording. I propose a x2 multiplier for Mr McTigue for refusing to accept the mantle of authoring the match report and, after being given the scorebook, leaves it behind on the bench, shame on you Sir.
Then onto Mr Grant, who’s blatant laissez fair attitude to scoring might well have cost us the match, who actually knows what we scored, because one things is for sure, the book doesn’t show to the reality of the match! So for that, and also refusing to author the match report, you Sir, have a multiplier of x3.
With that said, onto the more pleasurable task of reporting on the evenings play. I would be reporting based on fact, if I had some facts to start with, but the book is pretty bereft of fact (Grant you waste of space).
So, I guess a work of fiction is required, we were majestic, both with bat and ball. With a dazzling display of batting prowess Boycey led the way with a mighty 46 (maybe more, we just don’t know, Grant you’re useless), Charlie D, Josh “it’s my birthday” , AJ all had respectable knocks reaching double figures before surrendering their wicket.
Even the mighty Beef managed to hit two balls this time without giving up a catch, step 1 of his recovery plan achieved! Mr Boulton took the final runs in the final over to reach double figures without loss.
So to the bowling and fielding, well to use the vernacular, No effing idea what happened, nothing in the book to refer to (Please come back Mr Grant Snr, because your son is no bloody good at …anything ?). From my faded memory, here are what I consider to be the highlights and lowlights.
Well done “birthday boy” for catching a ball and not severely injuring yourself in the process, you made your old man proud. Talking of Beef, what’s with the sprawling around on the ground anytime a ball comes near you, and how the hell can a ball find its way between your belly and the ground? Great display of catching by our sponsor Mr McCue, in the face of adversity, in the form of an interfering AJ. It was comedy gold in the making and I’m so glad our sponsor made the catch, because if not, we would be hearing about it for the rest of the season. Mr Danby also made a wonderful low catch on the boundary to demonstrate his “all round” capability and positioning himself as the leader in the Mike Gatting cup. Can someone please get Mr Collier some new gloves, because if he carries on like this, he’ll be known as Mr Butterfingers, legs, knees and toes.
But, despite the valiant efforts of most people (Grant take note) all to no avail, apparently we lost in the last over with 4 balls left to bowl…but did we though?, we might have actually won, guess we will never know…
Finally, I would like to say that no cars were harmed in the making of this match report but I would be lying, Mr Grant Snr’s VW has a few dents that weren’t there before. Grant Jnr might have made a better job of protecting the car ( as a young Master Jameson demonstrated by protecting his old mans Beemer) but instead he insisted he was better utilised as a scorer, I think readers you know by now, sadly that was not the case.
Come on the The Racqs, brought to you by Snows Group …a family operated motor dealer…
Wot no wickets…
The Racqueteers vrs Izaak Lions 30thMay 2019
Picture the scene, lush green country side, quaint and quiet country village set in the rolling hills of the South Downs. Talking of which, the pitch, had more rolling hills in it than the surrounding countryside. The irony was there was even a pitch roller parked by the pavilion, what a waste of time that must be!
So, to “cut to the chase”. We were shit, shite and a complete bunch of terds, and that was just the observation from our sponsor, and he didn’t even turn up to watch the match, too busy highfalutin with the hoi polloi of the cricket world, getting pissed up with Darren Gough and managing to avoid watching the match he was actually present at…anyway nice touch with the video Mr McCue, pity it was for nowt.
We batted first, well some of us batted, some just went through motions …First to go was that bloody useless McMurrugh chap, Beef? More like chop liver, emulating the sponsors performance the previous week by going for a duck, caught(no surprise there) second ball.
Mr Gorvin batted well, retired on 25 and came back in for 1 ball, if only his run calling was better, nearly ran out his partner, the aforementioned “chopped liver” before he had even taken strike and then not content with that, managed to do the dirty on Master Jameson, who was yet to get into his stride, Shame on you sir…
Mr McMurrugh Jnr, although you would need to be a brave person to call him junior, looked promising, after a only one ball warm up in the nets, went out and blasted a 4 first ball, and then another 4 second ball…here we go we thought, sadly a few singles later and one more boundary he was out for 15.
So to Mr Jameson, looking for restoration of the family pride and steadying the listing ship, shame to say after a boundary and a single, that was that. Oh what might have been. Now desperately down into the middle order, Mr McTIgue did well, as demonstrated by his celebration on making contact with the ball, only to be reminded by his batting partner he also has to run once the ball has been hit the required distance from the wicket. His final shot was a peach, nicely struck, clearly off to a boundary, only for a fielder to spoil what would have been a momentous occasion by catching it, the blighter.
Some other chaps batted, Mr Taylor swung the bat well for 13 including a 6, well done Sir. Messrs Rees and Cells put some runs on the board with a 4 apiece. Then to the Skip, striding out Mr Collier looked defiant, fire in his eyes (as opposed to in his mouth), moving purposefully to take strike and show this lot how it’s done and prove that the Racqs have a sting in their tail. He showed ‘em alright, with a fine display of singles, doubles and a 4, he marked up the 2ndhighest score of 15 not out. His partnership with Mr Grant, was looking promising until Mr Grant, with a new set of eyes, was run out for 11, (maybe the eyes aren’t the problem, it’s the legs that need to be worked on). including a glorious 6, one of only 2 in our innings. Then there was Mr Alvarado, not much could be done by now but went for it and was run out, 3rdone of the match…maybe we need to focus on our calling/running skills.
So, despite the odds, we did manage to last the full 22 overs, but for a paltry 119. We needed some sharp bowling and fielding to make this a match…
Well, we bowled and fielded, in the words of Forest Gump, “and that’s all I have to say about that”.
With no wickets, dropped catches and stupid local rules that meant everyone had to bowl, whether they can or not, it’s no surprise that we ended up losing and being castigated (if not castrated) by our sponsor.
Post match report ends on the only successful part of the evening with the fine kitty balance, showing considerable levels of income after only 2 matches played. If we carry on like this, our team dinner will be in the The Ivy, Covent Garden (hint hint Sponsor).
Well I’m sure it can’t get any worse and worse thing happen at sea, but for now…in the immortal words of Yazz and The plastic population…”The only way is up”….
Come on the The Racqs, brought to you by Snows Group …a family operated motor dealer…